Well, we didn't make it out on the 4th of July to explore the local Fair on the Square, or to watch fireworks. The stomach bug hit our house hard, so we stayed home and I watched the fireworks from my little yard (if you want to call it that). To be honest, 4th of July might be one of my least favorite holidays. Not because I dislike it or am unpatriotic, but simply because it was never a focus of celebration in our family. We're a Christmas and birthdays kind of family. And it's way to hot in Texas to celebrate something in the middle of the summer. Truth.
My mom always told me that she things my method of "escapism" when I'm unhappy with life or going through something is to sleep. She's probably right. When I'm upset I find myself sleeping much more than I normally do, and when I'm happy and excited about life I could function on a couple hours. So on this beautiful Amarillo Saturday, I woke up early, packed up my computer, bible, Ragamuffin Gospel, and came the one of the local coffee shops to just be. I didn't realize until I got here that this is what I need to be doing to normalize life in a new place. It feels more like home now than it has since I moved here, and after taking time to just be here and read and spend time in the presence of God, I'm so at peace after an anxiety filled week.
Most of the time the answers and solutions are right in front of my face.
So today I'm relaxing in the coffee shop and running errands. I'm finding the post office, I'm going grocery shopping, and I'm baking cookies this afternoon because I befriended the two only other women on my "team" in the company, and we decided we're going to do fun stuff. Like bake cookies and cupcakes and have fun days.
I'm getting there. :)
Saturday, July 7, 2012
Tuesday, July 3, 2012
Time to get kickin'.
It's been a long time, so this post is split up into 2 sections. Updates, and my thoughts for the day.
Life updates:
On Sunday I came home from a weekend in Kentucky. I went home to be in my beautiful friend Angela's wedding. It was so good. I was able to fly in a day early and spend time with my family- which was amazing. Shopping with my mama, time in the sun with the little ones, lunch with my sister and parents, dinner with my brothers and sister-in-law, and Suits with the twins. Oh, we squeezed everyone in in that too-short day. The rest of the weekend was spent with the most beautiful bride, celebrating with one of the strongest couples I know. I am so blessed to have been part of such a special day.
On a work note, after being in the office for a couple weeks, it's time to hit the road again! On my own this time! I've graduated to touring cafes alone. Time to buck up and own my position. Next week I'm in Louisiana (training a cafe manager and store manager!), the next week I'm in Arkansas/Kansas/Oklahoma, and the next week I think I'm in Arizona (which I'm not exactly "excited" about. I can do without 118 degree weather, thanks). And then I'm back in the office for a couple weeks. I like having a schedule. It makes me feel more organized.
My husband is way too good to me. I'm spoiled rotten, and let me tell you, I act like it sometimes. Ryan made my birthday in Texas so great. There were presents, dinners, and movie nights. There was also a new car, though he swears that wasn't part of my birthday. It just happened to fall at the same time. And it's awesome. I never thought I was a car person, but it only took me an hour to become extremely attached. It's awesome.
Thoughts for the day:
I think I will always hear my papa's voice in my head saying "it hurts to be stretched". This week I realized that while it may hurt to be stretched, that's no excuse for reacting poorly.
I've been whiny since we moved to Amarillo. I've been whiny, grumpy, tired, and lazy. At work and at home. I haven't shown love and patience at home or at work. I've been hard on myself with a new job, constantly expecting perfection, hard on my new work environment, expecting everyone to read my mind and know when I'm struggling with something or have questions I don't want to ask, and hard on my husband when I come home- expecting him to know exactly what I need when I walk in in such a bad mood from working myself up all day at work. While there may be a grace period after moving away from everything you know, I guarantee that grace period is not 8 weeks long. Nor should it be. Today someone at work asked me how it was going and how the new job was, and I didn't realize the negativity in my voice until she questioned my answer. "Pretty good". It wasn't full of my normal excitement and joy, my gung-ho attitude that helped me get this amazing job in the first place. Just a little halfhearted happiness while I let a day of challenging tasks get to me. That's not how I feel. I love my new job- I adore working in the office and getting to work with all the cafes. Focusing on just the cafes after 8 months of working with the whole store is like freedom to me. I have the freedom to train, to streamline processes, and to learn more about people. Sure there are a couple aspects of the job that I don't love (Excel? seriously, could Microsoft make a more confusing program? I know, I know, it's easy for most people), but since when do I let that outweigh the things I love?
Well, no more. Now that the epiphany has come, I couldn't keep on even if I wanted to. I don't want to be that kind of example as I'm settling in here. It's time to get up off the dirt. We moved. We're here. Hiding in our apartment won't magically transport us back to Kentucky. It's time to get out into the city and discover things. It's time to make friends and make a life here. It's time to move on.
I give you permission if you're reading this to keep asking me if I've made friends yet. If I've learned something new about Amarillo. If I've found my favorite spots in the city yet. Do it.
Life updates:
On Sunday I came home from a weekend in Kentucky. I went home to be in my beautiful friend Angela's wedding. It was so good. I was able to fly in a day early and spend time with my family- which was amazing. Shopping with my mama, time in the sun with the little ones, lunch with my sister and parents, dinner with my brothers and sister-in-law, and Suits with the twins. Oh, we squeezed everyone in in that too-short day. The rest of the weekend was spent with the most beautiful bride, celebrating with one of the strongest couples I know. I am so blessed to have been part of such a special day.
On a work note, after being in the office for a couple weeks, it's time to hit the road again! On my own this time! I've graduated to touring cafes alone. Time to buck up and own my position. Next week I'm in Louisiana (training a cafe manager and store manager!), the next week I'm in Arkansas/Kansas/Oklahoma, and the next week I think I'm in Arizona (which I'm not exactly "excited" about. I can do without 118 degree weather, thanks). And then I'm back in the office for a couple weeks. I like having a schedule. It makes me feel more organized.
My husband is way too good to me. I'm spoiled rotten, and let me tell you, I act like it sometimes. Ryan made my birthday in Texas so great. There were presents, dinners, and movie nights. There was also a new car, though he swears that wasn't part of my birthday. It just happened to fall at the same time. And it's awesome. I never thought I was a car person, but it only took me an hour to become extremely attached. It's awesome.
 |
| I have more fun with my siblings than I do most people. I can honestly say, along with my husband, they are my best friends. |
She's just gorgeous. I had so much fun being part of her special day.
Isn't it pretty? It's the first car I've ever had that felt like it "fit" me. I'm in love.
Thoughts for the day:
I think I will always hear my papa's voice in my head saying "it hurts to be stretched". This week I realized that while it may hurt to be stretched, that's no excuse for reacting poorly.
I've been whiny since we moved to Amarillo. I've been whiny, grumpy, tired, and lazy. At work and at home. I haven't shown love and patience at home or at work. I've been hard on myself with a new job, constantly expecting perfection, hard on my new work environment, expecting everyone to read my mind and know when I'm struggling with something or have questions I don't want to ask, and hard on my husband when I come home- expecting him to know exactly what I need when I walk in in such a bad mood from working myself up all day at work. While there may be a grace period after moving away from everything you know, I guarantee that grace period is not 8 weeks long. Nor should it be. Today someone at work asked me how it was going and how the new job was, and I didn't realize the negativity in my voice until she questioned my answer. "Pretty good". It wasn't full of my normal excitement and joy, my gung-ho attitude that helped me get this amazing job in the first place. Just a little halfhearted happiness while I let a day of challenging tasks get to me. That's not how I feel. I love my new job- I adore working in the office and getting to work with all the cafes. Focusing on just the cafes after 8 months of working with the whole store is like freedom to me. I have the freedom to train, to streamline processes, and to learn more about people. Sure there are a couple aspects of the job that I don't love (Excel? seriously, could Microsoft make a more confusing program? I know, I know, it's easy for most people), but since when do I let that outweigh the things I love?
Well, no more. Now that the epiphany has come, I couldn't keep on even if I wanted to. I don't want to be that kind of example as I'm settling in here. It's time to get up off the dirt. We moved. We're here. Hiding in our apartment won't magically transport us back to Kentucky. It's time to get out into the city and discover things. It's time to make friends and make a life here. It's time to move on.
I give you permission if you're reading this to keep asking me if I've made friends yet. If I've learned something new about Amarillo. If I've found my favorite spots in the city yet. Do it.
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